Nachos

Nacho-Average-Rater©*

*Subject to Subjectivity

Chips.
The backbone of the nacho, though oft ignored, is the chips themselves.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Yellow corn chips are included.	+ 2
More than one corn chip type used.	+1 for each additional chip type.
If chips are homemade…	+1 quality, crunchy, yum -1 flaky or weird
Grease level under control.	+1 low -1 high
Subtotal →

Cheese.
This simple ingredient can make or break the nachos.   Ultimately you’re looking for thoroughly melted and natural cheese produce.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
The cheese is thoroughly melted.	+2 yes -1 no
Multiple cheeses are involved.	+ 1 for each additional cheese type.
Canned cheese or “nacho cheese” used.	-1
Cheese dispersed evenly.	+1 even - 1 major clumps
Some of the cheese is “browned”.	+1
Subtotal →

Tomatoes/Salsa/other fancy names.
These help to round out the plate and add complexity to the bouquet and mouth feel.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Tomatoes are fresh.	+2
Tomatoes/Salsa involves other things like onions or herbs.	+2
Tomatoes are not “soaking” the chips.	+1
There is a good amount.	+1 just enough - 1 too little or too much
Subtotal →

Sour Cream and Guacamole.
For many, these components heighten the experience beyond their wildest dreams.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Guacamole is present.	+ 1 room temperature - 1 something is “off”
Sour Cream is present.	+ 1 normal sour cream - 1 flavored sour cream
Neither!	+2 stands alone -1 too dry without somethin’ somethin’

Olives.
Irrelevant, imposing, and, frankly, irritating.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Olives are included.	-2
Subtotal →

Beans.
They need to be there.  Did we stutter?
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Black beans are included.	+2
A substitution for black beans has been attempted.	0 does not detract from dish -1 detracts from dish
Subtotal →

Meat.
Meat on nachos is a highly personal component, if one at all.  There are parameters that must be met regardless of patron preferences.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
If CHILI	+1 zesty and NOT SWEET + 1 dispersed well - 1 causes overwhelming sog
If CHICKEN	+2 white breast - 2 riddled with that chewy stuff, clearly not choice cuts (I’m looking at you on Sundays, Iron Hill)
If OTHER (aka crab)	+ 2 tasty - 2 creepy
If MEAT-FREE	+2 stands alone! - 1 feels somehow lacking
Subtotal →

Jalapenos.
I cannot overemphasize the importance of appropriate jalapeno incorporation.
Description	Point System	Point Tally
Jalapenos included.	+2 fresh -3 canned -2 absent
Jalapenos are evenly dispersed.	+1
Extra jalapenos are available upon request.	+1
Roasted jalapenos are present.	0 you’re okay with that -1 you’re weirded out – why aren’t these sliced?
Subtotal →

GRAND TOTAL! →	/25
Tip!	Multiply your score by 4 to get x/100! (wink wink)

Please email leighcgreen@gmail.com with scores of 21 or above.

Local Nacho Roundup.